Editor’s Note: When the Kraft family bought The New England Patriots football team in the mid-90s, they had 6 employees and $16M in revenue. Then Lou Imbriano joined the team as Vice President and Chief Marketing Officer. Over the next ten years or so, working for two of the smartest owners in sports, Imbriano built powerful relationships that allowed the organization to increase revenue more than 600%. A new stadium? Lou was up to the task. Increased sponsorships and revenue? Revenues grew to over $90M.

Today The Patriots are riding high, getting ready for the Super Bowl. Lou is now CEO of Trinity One Sports—using his experience to help teams use social media to increase brand strength and revenue. This is his first contribution to the Assistly blog. We look forward to sharing his knowledge with you periodically.

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A key piece of any business relationship is the responsibility that comes with it. I order to forge a truly unbreakable partnership, you must first and foremost, stay true to your word. The foundation of each relationship is built upon the credibility that you bring to it. Because of the fast-paced world in which we operate, it’s easy to let things slip through the cracks, but each time you allow that to happen, it erodes the very fiber of the relationship. This is why you must always do what you say you are going to do. It is as simple as that. The promises you make are the building blocks of the relationship you forge. The promises you keep are strong like brick, while the ones you break crumble into rubble.

Sales people, as a group, happen to be one of the biggest offenders in this area. Not necessarily because they are trying to be sleazy or deceitful, but because they have a very hard time saying no. It is a misconception that saying no erodes the trust and credibility of a business relationship. This is untrue; in fact, the exact opposite is the case. Saying no in a “real” way can actually strengthen a relationship. In Winning the Customer, we discuss the merits of Relationship Architecture and why managing your “yes” and “no” are so important to building a business relationship.

Here is my advice on saying “no” from an excerpt of Winning the Customer.

I always stressed to my sales group that a thoughtfully delivered answer has much more impact than a rushed “yes.” You must be absolutely sure that you can deliver before you offer the positive response. In this regard, “no” can be your friend and will earn
you respect if you use it appropriately. Here are three ways to recognize when “no” is appropriate in a business relationship and when “yes” will drastically erode the relationship and prevent revenue.

1) You must say no when you know that the request is impossible to accomplish and that there is no chance of your delivering on the agreement without the presence of luck. This also includes promises that could possibly be fulfilled, but would be so costly that they would exceed realistic expectations and go beyond what the relationship demands.

2) You must say no when the person making the request has continually asked for favors, perks, and additional items that are outside the scope of your relationship, without regard to the quantity of requests and with the deliberate intention of receiving more than she is giving. This one-sided situation is a clear indication that you are being taken advantage of.

3) You must say no when you are asked to do something unethical, immoral, or damaging to your reputation and the equity that you have built in your brand—personal or corporate.

Saying no in these situations should not damage the business relationship you possess with anyone: partner, client, or consumer. If saying no in these circumstances damages
your relationship, then the relationship wasn’t built properly in the first place. The most solid relationships exist when everyone participates to achieve a mutually beneficial result. Don’t be afraid to be real. Don’t be a doormat. Just say no!

This is not a rule of thumb for just sales people, but for everyone in the promise-
making business. I always tell people to treat a commitment as they would if they
were making a promise to their kids. If you tell your children you are attending their
games, you need to make sure that whatever it takes, you are there. Otherwise it’s
deflating and very disappointing to your child. You have to take great care with their
feelings, so being honest and real to them is very important to your credibility as
a parent. You should be handling that parent/child relationship with extreme care
and precision. If you approach all promises in the same way, regardless of to whom
you are making them, you will be successful in tending to the responsibility that
comes with any relationship. Don’t forget, “No” is part of the process.

Follow Lou on Twitter: @LouImbriano

Check out his ideas on sports and social media:
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